What is wrong with us?
Anyway, have a Happy Mother’s Day.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Mama gets no paid leave
The Economic Policy Institute says that compared to countries with similar per capita income, the United States provides the fewest mandated maternity leave benefits in both length of leave and amount of paid time off.
What is wrong with us?
Anyway, have a Happy Mother’s Day.
What is wrong with us?
Anyway, have a Happy Mother’s Day.
Only one day?
Wow. A whole day for myself. After enduring hours of labor to give birth to three kids, I get a whole day. Let's see, what can I do in one whole day?
Maybe I can make up for the many nights I lost sleep from a sick or feverish child. Maybe I can find a quiet room and reflect on the many days that I just wanted to be left alone only to have the word 'MOMMY!' screamed at me repeatedly. Maybe I can go out to dinner and enjoy myself instead of cooking a big meal and hearing my favorite words - "I don't want this!"
Oh, don't get me wrong. Motherhood is a wonderful experience. A child's first words, first steps, birthdays, graduations. Just seeing your child's beautiful smile can brighten your whole day!
I understand now what my own mother felt. I too have shared in the joys and pains of motherhood. I will enjoy this day and be thankful that God has blessed me with children of my own. I wouldn't have it any other way. But I will also take full advantage of this day, because I know the next day is certainly not Mother's Day.
Happy Mother's Day! Stay sane.
Maybe I can make up for the many nights I lost sleep from a sick or feverish child. Maybe I can find a quiet room and reflect on the many days that I just wanted to be left alone only to have the word 'MOMMY!' screamed at me repeatedly. Maybe I can go out to dinner and enjoy myself instead of cooking a big meal and hearing my favorite words - "I don't want this!"
Oh, don't get me wrong. Motherhood is a wonderful experience. A child's first words, first steps, birthdays, graduations. Just seeing your child's beautiful smile can brighten your whole day!
I understand now what my own mother felt. I too have shared in the joys and pains of motherhood. I will enjoy this day and be thankful that God has blessed me with children of my own. I wouldn't have it any other way. But I will also take full advantage of this day, because I know the next day is certainly not Mother's Day.
Happy Mother's Day! Stay sane.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Another childless Mother's Day
When I woke up this morning, my eggs were angry with me. They wanted to know why I was about to celebrate yet another Mother’s Day without a child of my own.
“Tamika. Tamika. Tamika,” my eggs lectured. “We are not getting any younger. What are you waiting for? If you’re going to hold out much longer, then you might as well just freeze us now!”
I’ve been married nearly 8 years. So my eggs do not care that I am growing in my career and am waiting for the perfect house in the perfect school district. And my eggs have no clue that I am terrified of being torn asunder (ring of fire, anyone?).
My eggs’ best friend, my ob-gyn, has added his two cents to my ongoing childlessness during every annual visit since I was 27.
“Do you realize that your fertility is now on the decline,” he asked. “You don’t want to wait too long. You might want to start thinking about when you want to have that baby.”
I might want to START thinking about it? That’s ALL I think about! And that’s all it seems anyone asks me about.
“So, when are you having kids?”
“When are you having a baby?”
“When are you starting a family?”
“So, when will we hear the pitter-patter of little feet?”
“Any plans to build a nursery in that other bedroom?”
And my all-time favorite: “What are you waiting for?”
I don’t know what I’m waiting for actually. Nothing will ever be perfect. Not the career. Not the house. Not the marriage. Not the school district.
Maybe I’m just waiting until I’m okay with not being in control of my life and my body (not that I ever have been in control, but I like to pretend).
Maybe I’m waiting until the thought of surrendering my body to childbirth and surrendering (some parts of) my future to motherhood doesn’t make me hyperventilate.
Maybe I’m waiting for my eggs and my ob-gyn to shut up.
“Tamika. Tamika. Tamika,” my eggs lectured. “We are not getting any younger. What are you waiting for? If you’re going to hold out much longer, then you might as well just freeze us now!”
I’ve been married nearly 8 years. So my eggs do not care that I am growing in my career and am waiting for the perfect house in the perfect school district. And my eggs have no clue that I am terrified of being torn asunder (ring of fire, anyone?).
My eggs’ best friend, my ob-gyn, has added his two cents to my ongoing childlessness during every annual visit since I was 27.
“Do you realize that your fertility is now on the decline,” he asked. “You don’t want to wait too long. You might want to start thinking about when you want to have that baby.”
I might want to START thinking about it? That’s ALL I think about! And that’s all it seems anyone asks me about.
“So, when are you having kids?”
“When are you having a baby?”
“When are you starting a family?”
“So, when will we hear the pitter-patter of little feet?”
“Any plans to build a nursery in that other bedroom?”
And my all-time favorite: “What are you waiting for?”
I don’t know what I’m waiting for actually. Nothing will ever be perfect. Not the career. Not the house. Not the marriage. Not the school district.
Maybe I’m just waiting until I’m okay with not being in control of my life and my body (not that I ever have been in control, but I like to pretend).
Maybe I’m waiting until the thought of surrendering my body to childbirth and surrendering (some parts of) my future to motherhood doesn’t make me hyperventilate.
Maybe I’m waiting for my eggs and my ob-gyn to shut up.
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